Making Apple Butter in the Mountains -
October 2008
I was coerced by my mom to come up to the mountains for the weekend to
help them make a couple of batches of the tasty
southern delicacy known as "apple butter"...

Mamaw was of course one of the first to show up, and she got straight
to work, stirring the apples., while Bryan gets distracted
by the dogs frolicking behind him.

We even got the American Starship Eagle himself to help out, though
only partially as he had left his beer helmet at home and
could only free up one hand to stir.

Hariett worked on getting the feast ready, here seen mucking about with
a bowl full of homemade bread pudding.

A rare moment when Art wasn't down in the yard playing with his toy
construction equipment. And why had he stopped?

To eat a cupcake, of course. Smart kid...I ate one too. I
got a little less of it on my shirt though.

Any time Bryan is "doing work" the overalls come out. And my head
is the size of a record-setting watermelon. I'm pretty sure it
accounts for 2/3rds of my body weight.

This was Burt Reynolds first road trip with us, and his first trip to
the grandparent's house. He enjoyed himself thoroughly.

Even my cousin Emily gave things a go, most likely breaking numerous
state and federal child labor laws.

An overhead shot of the nearly-finished apple butter.

An action shot of putting the apple butter into jars and then sealing
them for freshness (what the kids call "canning" I hear).

And while all of this was going on, Joyce tried to abscond with a cute
baby.

Jake and Lauren.

Let's take a closer look at that shirt Jake is wearing shall we?
Totally fuckin' awsome.

Let's take a closer look at his beer while we are at it...

Max and Burt, sniffing the world.

Later in the day Sarah, her husband kevin and their kid with the
awesome giant eyes popped by to help with the second batch.

Kevin and the scrogglin, who couldn't look any more like Sarah in this
picture if he tried.

Creepy bastard.

This dog wrestling and jostling went on for about eight solid
hours. Max could barely move the next day because burt wore him
out something fierce.

The second batch...while most folks had gone home, us die hards were
force to finish the job.

When I look at Chelsea here all I can think of is Gob on "Arrested
Development" doing his chicken impression.

With some fresh apple butter in hand, we drove back to Cary with one
tired dog in tow.
Apple Butter Recipe
Shitload of apples
a jug or two of apple juice
a bunch of ground cinnamon
pounds of sugar
a couple of boxes of red hots
Peel and slice apples, removing the core and seeds. Throw
them in the pot with the apple juice over a fire. Cook for three
or so hours. Add in the red hots, sugar and cinnamon. Put
it in a jar. Eat the shit out of it with some fresh
biscuits.